A toxic pickle
Most of my friends and I are at the age where our older loved-ones are starting to die off. I hate thinking about it, and I don’t necessarily want to talk about it either.
In fact, everyone I know has had loved ones–even parents–die already. My friend, David, has had several people in his life die and you would think that coping would be easier for him. Not so.
He and Dad lived behind a little hair salon, and they became great friends with the lady who owned the place. She and her family were those type of no-nonsense, salt-of-the-earth people. She was also a caring church-lady type with a big (dyed) red beehive-esque hairdo.
Since the salon was right next to the house, and she practically lived at the salon, it was only natural for David-them to be very neighborly.
At her funeral, David stood next to Miss Pat’s open casket and sobbed unabashedly.
It was terrible. Miss Pat was very loved, and there was a lot of crying going on by both men and women.
I had gone up to the casket, too, and it just wasn’t Miss Pat. They had caked all kinds of make-up on her. If they hadn’t done that, she would have looked so much better and just…well…natural, more like herself.
I have been to a few funerals, and I really do not like going up to see the person in their casket. I don’t mean to be disrespectful, but it just makes my heart race and my blood pump loudly in my ears.
Funerals, death, and arrangements is not something I really want to discuss with my parents. The fact is that I am an only child. I won’t have the support of siblings to deal with it all. Will I be able to keep my wits about me when one of my parents dies? I just can’t think about it…
So, I sent this email to Dad just to get a feel for things.
There is a woman at work whose mother-in-law died recently. We got to talking about that sensitive subject that we just don’t want to talk about. So, I am going to pose it to you…
I have life insurance through my company’s benefit plans, for me and for Ilona.
This is where and how I’d like to be buried…read & watch video:
Green burials gaining momentum (click for article/video)
If I can’t be buried at this cemetery, then anywhere that would accept a ‘green burial’ would be ideal. At first, I thought I would like to be cremated and have my ashes scattered near Chinaman’s Hat. (Hey, if my family has to scatter my ashes, it may as well be a somewhat fun trip, too!)
However, I would much rather give myself back to the earth instead of being even more of a burden after death. Cremation wastes a ton of energy and fossil fuel.
Have you and David talked about death? How/where would you like us to handle things when you pass?
(Again, I hate talking about this, but…it needs to be talked about. Mom wants to be buried at that Polish church she goes to.)
xoxo,
*B*
